F*ck Affirmations

The dumb ones, anyway

By now, y'all have caught on to my style: realistic, relatable, and a little bit crude.

Today I'm here to chime in on a frequently utilized therapeutic technique known widely as positive affirmations.

In short? Fuck ’em.

Do I argue that telling your mind about good things is helpful for mood and general well-being?

No, that makes total sense.

Do I think that saying positive things about yourself, to yourself, could increase self-confidence?

Of course!

What I don’t believe in is telling your brain some shit it won’t believe. I’m anxious, not stupid.

So if you’re like me and respond to “Open your heart and soak in the wonder of this glorious day” with some major side-eye, here are a handful of realistic affirmations to try for the next week.

1. I will survive this fucking day.

2. I try super hard to be a good person.

3. It’s physically impossible for everyone on earth to hate me.

4. Crying does not mean something is wrong with me.

5. A shitty day does not mean I have a shitty life.

6. Life is a bitch but I am not.

7. I am loved by at least one person.

---

That’s my seven! Pop over to the comments to add your own, we could all use a little realistic reinforcement.